The Paralysis of Perfectionism

A few months back I posted about how I had made a new covenant with myself to communicate more often with my blog. It was time to equip, encourage, and inspire others to achieve greatness in their lives, and form a more intimate relationship with their Savior. No longer would I sit idly by while there were droves of hungry people scouring the internet for content that would drive them to a closer walk with Jesus. And then, I did nothing. Weeks, in fact months, have gone by without a single post. Why? Perfectionism.


There have been countless topics that have rattled around in my head, endless ideas that I know would be a blessing to my readers. But with a growing business, a new baby (#4), and all the responsibilities of being a husband and father, how could I ever have time to write a post that lived up to the almost unreasonable standards I place on myself? I couldn’t, so I didn’t For some reason, in my mind it was better to do nothing and do it perfectly, than do something that could help others and perhaps it have a few mistakes or typos. Sound familiar?

Perfectionism is a nasty disease that affects far too many Christians, preventing them from achieving their goals and implementing their visions. Perhaps you won’t witness to your neighbor because you are so afraid you’ll say the wrong thing. Maybe you don’t volunteer for the church choir, because you know you’re not nearly as good as Sister Johnson in the 3rd row. And sadly, perhaps you’re even one of those churchgoers who has never experienced the unmatched peace and love that comes from a relationship with Jesus because, “you’ve got some things you need to get in order first”.

I’ve read the Bible cover to cover, and I didn’t find one perfect person other than Christ himself. Every other follower was blemished & flawed, especially at their time of conversion. The “hall of faith” in Hebrews 11 could just as easily have been a “hall of shame” as most of those listed have some of the most notorious failures and colossal screw-ups listed in the holy writ.



The fact is that God is not looking for perfect people, just willing ones. Moses couldn’t talk right, Joseph was a little too impressed with himself, David blew it in a moment of stupidity, Peter couldn’t seem to get his foot out of his mouth, and Paul was a hateful persecutor of anything that moved. However, the one thing they have in common is that they were all used by God in a powerful way. Could you be next? I’d love to hear your thoughts…

(I wrote this blog post in 20 minutes and only proofread it once. So it may not be perfect, but it is done, and out there on the internet to bless anyone who happens by the blog. Yes, I can do it, and will continue to do it…perfect or not.)

Why New Year's Resolutions Don't Work

“It is a trap for a man to dedicate something rashly and only later to consider his vows.” -Prov. 20:25

Yes, it’s that time of the year once again. With the changing of the calendar, and a fresh 365 out in front of us, there are a few traditions that we all must endure. For the next few weeks you will have to scribble out 2009 more times than you can count. The NCAA and its high-paying sponsors will force feed you a full course of meaningless college bowl games. You will be subjected to endless dieting & health club commercials with promises to help you shed those holiday pounds. And of course, it wouldn’t be a new year in America without January’s most overused and hackneyed phrase; The New Year’s Resolution.

Don’t get me wrong. I think that goals are one of the most important and integral steps in achieving positive change in a person’s life. I’m sure that there was also a time in our history when the word “resolution” actually meant something to people. After all, Webster’s Dictionary defines the term as, “the act of determining upon an action or course of action” and the root word resolve is defined as a “firmness of purpose.” Sounds pretty impressive, doesn’t it?

However, somewhere along the way, this powerful term of solemn commitment and dogged determination became more of a weak suggestion or impotent recommendation (remember those two dozen U.N. Resolutions passed against Iraq?). Perhaps it took place around the same time that “until death do us part” became “until something better or more exciting comes along.” Or maybe it was sometime after we witnessed yet another political campaign promise “change”, only to quickly turn back to business as usual as soon as their feet hit the beltway. With so many promises broken, and so few people who say what they mean and mean what they say, is it any surprise that we find it so easy to break these annual pledges to ourselves?

So this year, as we begin a new decade in each of our lives, let’s go ahead and strike the word “resolution” from our vocabulary and truly start anew. I propose that we choose a different term to describe our new year’s commitment to modify our behavior. Except this time, I think we should choose one that packs a little punch, and includes a true commitment to lifelong change. I think it’s time for all of us to make our very first New Year’s Covenant.

The term “covenant” is actually not a new concept at all, but rather the revival of an age-old one. In ancient times, when men made a covenant, they would cut the flesh of animals and walk in a figure 8 pattern between the torn pieces of flesh. This action signified a bond “unto death” and the commitment had two components. First, the covenantor was submitting himself or herself to a literal death as punishment for breaking the covenant, thus suffering the same fate as the sacrificed animals. Second, the act signified a death to one’s selfish agenda and ego-centrism. From the time of the covenant commitment, life became less about the individual’s comfort, and more about a commitment to the vow which they have made.

Somewhere along the way, resolution became something you try. A covenant is something you’re willing to die for. It’s that type of tenacity and unflinching determination that brings about true and lasting change in our lives. No challenge, setback, or misstep will keep you from fulfilling your covenant promise. If you fall, you get back up. If you fail, you give it another go. If people tell you that you can’t, you just smile politely and walk away telling yourself, “Yes, I can. Yes, I can!” That type of true, passionate resolve will ensure that you see your goals accomplished and your dreams become reality in 2010…and many more years to come!

Author’s Note: One of my New Year’s covenants is to post informative & inspiring content on this blog more often. Take a minute and let me know one of your new year’s covenants in the comment section below. God bless, and have a happy new year!

There's a Reason the Grass Looks Greener...

“If the grass looks greener on the other side of the fence, you can rest assured that the water bill is higher there too.” –Maya Angelou

This is probably one of the best quotes I’ve read in a long time, and it’s so apropos when it comes to entrepreneurship. As a real estate agent, I have witnessed this “grass is always greener” mentality for many years. I have witnessed countless mortgage brokers, title agents, and real estate agents hop from company to company looking for that “right fit”. When business doesn’t take off for them like a rocket at the new company, their instinct is to immediately start looking for a new place to go. After all, it has to be the company, right? It couldn’t possibly be a problem with their work ethic, marketing plan, or implementation, could it?

I have seen this same phenomenon at work with friends and family members who are always involved with the latest network marketing or MLM craze. From Amway to Mary Kay, Noni Juice to Creative Memories, there is always a new get rich quick scheme that is going to solve all of their financial problems. When the “pie-in-the-sky” promise doesn’t immediately come to fruition, they fall hook line and sinker for the next “opportunity” that comes along. I am always amused when I get the same pitch as I’ve heard so many times before about how this new endeavor is “different” and it is a “ground floor” opportunity. Boy, if I had a nickel for every time I….Oh well, I digress.

Now don’t get my wrong, I am in no way criticizing the MLM companies. I don’t doubt their success stories for a second. In fact, I embrace their success stories and wish more people would learn from them. I can guarantee you that those who have achieved great success in any business, whether real estate, network marketing, or something completely different, did so by focusing their attention 100% on the task at hand. Successful people purpose in their hearts to do whatever it takes to achieve their goals. Their gaze is so fixed on the reward in front of them that they don’t have time to even look at the grass on the other side of the fence, much less determine whether or not it’s greener.

The point of Maya Angelou’s statement is this; If the grass is greener on the other side of the fence, there is good reason for it. The individual on the other side of the fence didn’t just get lucky, but rather made a sacrifice to do the things that other, less successful people were unwilling to do. It may have come in the form of a higher water bill, the expense and labor of applying fertilizer, or perhaps researching books and online articles on creating the perfect lawn. Whatever the difference was, it was not simply the location alone that made the grass greener. It was better decisions, harder work, and an unwavering attention to detail.

Whenever you find yourself tempted to start looking for the next big opportunity, ask yourself if you’ve really given everything to the last big opportunity. You may find that with a few small changes and a fresh commitment to doing the right things, you may just find success (and a greener lawn) right where you are.